Sunday, 01 August 2010 10:13

Ask Bely H August 2010

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Nine5Four The Magazine Ask Bely H. August 2010There’s a guy I am in love with but we don’t have the best situation. Although we are both very much into each other, life at the moment does not allow us to be together. However, he seems to string me along. He is unable to tell me his stance on any future relationship we may have. He doesn’t tell me if he see’s us together in a year or five. Meanwhile, he is a sweet as can be with me and doesn’t hesitate to show how much he cares. When we are together, we are together. But we cant seem to get past that and on to the next level. I am afraid that I’ll never feel what I feel again in my lifetime and I don’t want to wonder about what could have been, so I keep waiting and at times keep hurting. Should I turn my back on what I feel for him only because my family and friends tell me I deserve better or do I stick it out so that I’ll never wonder about the what if’s?

Lupe, Phoenix, AZ

When one is blinded by feelings induced by love its hard to break away from what you feel. Your friends and family may actually be telling you the truth because they know you deserve better and no one should be treated less than what they are worth. But no matter what they tell you or how many times they try and make you see, only you can choose to listen. If he cant outline what is next for the both of you in the near future, it could be a possibility that he cant see you in his future. If thats the case, you don’t want to him to string you along. Time is precious and while your are here waiting on him, mr. right could be waiting on you. Don’t be anyones door mat. You also can’t assume that you’ll never feel the same way for someone again, if you don’t venture off. If he is meant for you, then he will be there when he or things are ready to come together. You, can, wait for him and give him time until he see’s thing more clearly but relationships shouldn’t be complicated. You’re either into the person or you’re not. Where there is a will there is a way. Talk to your love interest and have an honest heart to heart. Don’t hold back on any feelings or concerns you may be suppressing. Its going to hurt, if years from now you’re the one hanging on and waiting for something to happen, while he has a change of heart and moves on. Be realistic. Think things through.


Can you fall in love at first sight or is it merely infatuation. Does lovehappen gradually or can you say I am in love with a person after just knowing them for a short period of time? How do you know you are in love. Is it when you realize that you accept the good and the bad things about the person and accept their flaws for what they are and accept that you cannot change the person.

Eliza

Torrance, CA

By definition, Love means a strong affection between people. But love differs in meaning and intensity from person to person. So, based on that definition, I do believe love at first sight is possible. The first thing that grabs your attention when you come across someone whom you may find attractive is attraction; their physical appearance. But as you begin to develop a relationship with someone, you take your love to different levels. You reach levels of deep admiration, strong emotions and unconditional feelings. These love levels are gradually reached, therefore, reaching the point of being in-love comes when you are past the outer appearance and are emotionally attached to that persons inner side. Accepting  a person for who they are and not attempting to change them is one of the most intense forms of love because it means you love them exactly how they are. Love can also be distorted by a person, in which they cant relate past a persons outer shell and base an infatuation on what they see. The connections don’t run deep and “true” love isn’t really acquired. Some things you may experience with your partner outweigh other things you two will go through and will only tighten your bonds which will nurture your love. Seeing is believing and so is love at first sight.

 

Last modified on Wednesday, 01 February 2012 10:28

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